I've been pretty quiet the past few months.
Children have been growing and time is swirling around too fast. So, I took some time to focus on their little faces. Look into their little souls. Snuggle their bodies when I felt like writing or kiss off their sweet cheeks when I wanted to open the MacBook.
Sometimes God comes through in ways you never knew He would.
It makes me think of an amazing bible study I did back in the winter. It was on Esther by Beth Moore. It's phenomenal.
Did you know God's name isn't mentioned once in that book of the bible?
But, His presence and intricate planning turned an average girl into an amazingly strong, intelligent, powerful queen.
You can feel God all over the words in the book of Esther.
Even when God is silent, He is still guiding & working out His plan.
"For if you keep silent at this time, relief and deliverance will rise for the Jews from another place, but you and your father’s house will perish. And who knows whether you have not come to the kingdom for such a time as this?” (Esther 4:14 ESV)
I LOVE love love this passage from Esther.
Sometimes God calls us to rise up and to follow through with the plan He has placed in front of us all while He is silent...
Huh?
Do you ever feel like you can't hear God?
Why is it that sometimes He gives us tangible cues to help guide our steps and other times He is silent?
Lately, I've felt like He is silent. But, I know He is there.
I've been wondering why I've been so uninspired to write.
Then, as quiet as He seems the more real He is.
As God made me pause, I stopped to focus on what is. Present.
I've been very present the past two months.
And here are a few of the biggest things I've learned:
We have always known our kids don't need 'stuff' but I've really been focusing on giving my kids 'experiences'. I don't care a lick about what I leave my kids with in this world but I do care about what kind of experiences I've helped provide. Good experiences, happy, painful, sad, eye opening experiences. And ALL of those experiences relating to the love of God and His word.
There is a fine line between your children experiencing different things in life and becoming an 'I'm entitled' person verses becoming a 'how can I help others experience these things' kind of person. Luckily, I've only had to strip my kids down to NOTHING in our house a few times (as in zero material possessions they love) for them to realize they are owed NOTHING in this world. We are entitled to NOTHING.
We owe God everything. He paid the ultimate sacrifice and my greatest attempts will never live up to the selfless sacrifice Jesus paid on the cross. Thank you, God, for Grace! And for Mercy!
I want to help teach my kids that even though you can't always see God directly in every circumstance, He is there. In every aspect of our lives God is present. Whether He is kicking our butts and slapping us silly or gently prodding & nudging our next move, He is the One orchestrating it all.
The biggest thing I've learned is this: put down your freaking phone.
I think about our current world we live in...
It's pretty weird.
There's not enough verbal communication anymore.
Put. Down. Your. Phone.
And go run around outside with your kids or lay in the floor and let them climb all over you.
You won't regret it (even if you accidentally peg your kid in the stomach with a baseball or get puke on your forehead.). I promise.
Jesus,
Thank you for YOU. Thank you for the little moments in my day where I can just be present. Thank you for little stinky toes and sweaty headed boys with red flushed cheeks. I praise you for dramatic interpretive dances by a tiny tutu loving Goldie lochs. Thanking you for Legos on my floor that cause puncture wounds at 3am (and maybe a curse word. But I'm still praising You). Lord, I thank you for 4am crib parties (the kind that involve miniature people. Also known as toddlers). Even when I don't act thankful, I am thankful for You. I am with most gratitude for belly laughing and squealing in my home. Oh!! How I am thankful for the buzz of tiny people chatter and chaos. Yes, Lord. Yes, I am thankful. Jesus, thank you for being quiet. Even when I ask you why You're quiet...I am thankful. Lord, thank you for revealing to me that it's time to be present. Even more present than I was before. Thank you for whispering the sweet words 'be still' into my heart. Thank you, Jesus, for the ability to smell my children's sweet salty skin after a day in the sun. I'm praising You for my bed full of sixty fingers and sixty toes. I. Am. Praising. You. If I have nothing in this world except my family and Jesus Christ then I have EVERYTHING. And my EVERYTHING is not anything I deserve. For I am owed nothing but I owe my EVERYTHING to the One whom I am most thankful.
In the name of Jesus I pray this prayer of thankfulness & gratitude,
Amen.
Find your stillness. Find your quiet place with God. He will show up in ways you never expected...
“Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!” (Psalm 46:10 ESV)
He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” (Psalm 91:1-2 ESV)
